January: Face Wash

Is blogging more often an admirable or practical New Year's Resolution? Is it even rational? Sometimes it's still difficult for me to acknowledge that I belong to a blog-loving, social media-centered generation. I assume women in their early 20s felt similar about their generation soon after winning the right to vote.

Anyway, for the next 30 days I plan on washing my face twice a day, every day. This blog is now officially a place for me to update on the small changes I plan on implementing month by month. I decided upon face-washing because I think it will be the easiest step to climb for me this year.

The Situation.

I woke up early this morning to take my sick, sick cat to the vet, and in my dawn-stricken haze, I found this article. I could almost hear the headline being announced on an evening news show preview, followed by the phrase, "and more, tonight at 7." The words 'mass hysteria' pack quite the punch; I feel as if every news headline in the past 10 years has been leading up to this pivotal news report. No, our country is not under nuclear attack, we have not yet run out of food and water, but MASS HYSTERIA is creeping upon the youths of this country, and soon enough, MASS HYSTERIA will sweep the nation.

HYSTERIA WILL SWEEP THE MASSES.

It might be hyperbolic, but it makes for a good story, no? The whole situation reminds me of Jean-Martin Charcot’s P’lconographie photographique de La Salpetriere. 

Women in a 'teaching hospital' react to hysteria hypnosis treatment.

As explained in the wikipedia articles linked above, La Salpetriere was a 'teaching hospital' in which medical students experimented on patients and also watched/studied different medical treatments on live patients. In addition to the usual medical undergraduate visitors, Jean-Martin Charcot, the 'founder of neurology,' let the general public bare witness to his treatments of female hysteria. Visitors would walk through the treatment center as if it was a museum, gawking at Charcot's so-called 'crazy' female patients. It was later speculated that many of these 'patients' were really hired actresses, but who knows? If MASS HYSTERIA is a contagious affliction, who's to say that these women did not actually experienced symptoms of temporary insanity?

We all have our temporary fits of madness, and throughout history, people with vaginas seem to be blamed more for this. What is it about our gender that makes us crazy, or rather, makes others think we are more crazy than our male counterparts? I'd like to think that we are simply (and generally) more expressive with our emotions and creativity, which makes us better actors, as well. It's all about acting, isn't it? Why not put on a show?

Diane Arbus created and captured many cookie characters through her photography, many of them women. Were they actors or characters?

But of course, Dr. Sigmund Freud was/is at the head of this psychological movement. Offensive as it can be, I love Freudian art. Salvador Dali explored Freud's dream studies.

“Dream Caused by the Flight of a Bee around a Pomegranate a Second Before Awakening” (1944), Salvador Dali. Thyssen-Bornemisza Museum, Madrid. ©Salvador Dalí, Gala-Salvador Dalí Foundation/Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York.

The Apotheosis of the Dollar, Dali.

I dig Surrealism because it doesn't have to make sense, and lately, life has felt more like a dream than reality (in both good and bad ways). The paintings are just a culmination of signs and symbols that are not normally associated with one another, but in dream-world, they make sense...or maybe I'm just another victim of HYSTERIA.

Some of the places, people, animals and beings that exist in dreams keep you wishing you were still dreaming throughout the day...

"Instead of stubbornly attempting to use surrealism for purposes of subversion, it is necessary to try to make of surrealism something as solid, complete and classic as the works of museums." Salvador Dali

Pythia

I found an entry in the Harvard Gazette about how our brains process music. (Take a quick read for yourself.) The first paragraph paints a beautiful picture:

"Your inner ear contains a spiral sheet that the sounds of music pluck like a guitar string.

This plucking triggers the firing of brain cells that make up the hearing parts of your brain. At the highest station, the auditory cortex, just above your ears, these firing cells generate the conscious experience of music. Different patterns of firing excite other ensembles of cells, and these associate the sound of music with feelings, thoughts, and past experiences.

Sound transmitted to the inner ear is broken down according to the spectrum of frequencies that make up sounds. This orderly arrangement of low to higher frequencies is mapped onto the brain much like the way low to high notes are mapped on a piano keyboard." [source.]

I don't know much about science either, but the way our brains process music fascinates me. It all sounds so beautiful and dreamy, as if an orchestra of greek and roman gods are living in your brain, stroking your inner ear and making sparklers out of your brain cells while Apollo acts as conductor.

Apollo was the patron God of poetry and music. The god Hermes made him a musical instrument called the lyre, which is a stringed instrument, like a harp or a guitar. The Romantic poet, John Keats, wrote a poetic ode to Apollo:

God of the golden bow,

And of the golden lyre,

And of the golden hair,

And of the golden fire,

Charioteer

Of the patient year,

Where---where slept thine ire,

When like a blank idiot I put on thy wreath,

Thy laurel, thy glory,

The light of thy story,

Or was I a worm---too low crawling for death?

O Delphic Apollo!

The Thunderer grasp'd and grasp'd,

The Thunderer frown'd and frown'd;

The eagle's feathery mane

For wrath became stiffen'd---the sound

Of breeding thunder

Went drowsily under,

Muttering to be unbound.

O why didst thou pity, and beg for a worm?

Why touch thy soft lute

Till the thunder was mute,

Why was I not crush'd---such a pitiful germ?

O Delphic Apollo!

The Pleiades were up,

Watching the silent air;

The seeds and roots in Earth

Were swelling for summer fare;

The Ocean, its neighbour,

Was at his old labour,

When, who---who did dare

To tie for a moment, thy plant round his brow,

And grin and look proudly,

And blaspheme so loudly,

And live for that honour, to stoop to thee now?

O Delphic Apollo!

by John Keats

Debussy is my favorite?

I work for a classical music radio station, and as of yet, I only answer phones and lick envelopes. However, I plan on moving on up by creating a bold, visual statement that the station needs. Classical music stations like the one I work for lose listeners every day, due to the fact that most of its listeners are elderly and the rest are probably music majors. Many young people do not want to listen to classical music because it seems boring to them (I'm generalizing, yes, but I also speak the truth). I know this because I used to be one of those young people, and I am only now realizing the immense capacity and potential of which instrumental music holds.

[image via.]

Active listening is the key to realizing that potential, which is why so many people on this earth have a hard time appreciating classical music. I hate to sound like an old toot when I say this, but here it goes: nowadays, we only hear classical music in the background, even if it is playing through our car speakers. This phenomenon is called "muzak," or "elevator music." Classical music is pleasant to hear during the slow moments of our days, like in the elevator or in traffic. Most of us do not crank up the Mozart on our way to work, though, because we can't sing along and we can rarely even hum along with the conductor. I am part of this clueless audience, and consequentially, I hit a wall each time I attempt to work on my visual marketing project.

I majored in art history in college, so I am more of a 'visual' person, which is why I like the composer Debussy. I love how intricate and interesting it is; it's as if Debussy sketched out each note in animated form for those who have never truly listened to music like his. It really is for classical music "virgins" like me (and maybe you)...take a listen (NOTE: "La Mer" means "Sea" or "Ocean," if that helps to put an image to the music):



Beautiful, right? At least I can appreciate good classical music when I hear it (or so I think).

I wish more people knew how to actively listen to such brilliant music, which is why I want my project to appeal to the masses. I want to connect the visual and the audial through strong, compelling graphics.

Visual art reminds me of chaos, emotion and bright, bold, color, while classical music seems to have an obvious science behind it. I am not inferring that art cannot be scientific, but I will imply that classical music seems more obviously calculated, delicate and intricate. There are particular instruments that play particular notes in classical pieces; the notes fit together like a puzzle or a math problem. Logic is a key component in most classical music pieces (again, this is just my opinion/theory).

However, with logic comes beautiful rhythm and graceful expression. If you listen to a piece often enough, the visuals show themselves to you. Color slowly manifests out from under the straight, thin lines of the composition and you, the listener, are immersed in music.

We didn't go to the Beach.

Jeff and I did not actually travel to the nice Texas beach but instead, we drove about an hour out to Marble Falls, where his family lake-house resides. He snapped a few nighttime photos from atop a lofty mountain, we had some ramen at the house, and watched the art-house insanity circus that is Blue Velvet. We then headed back to our tiny home and sickly cat in Austin. It was a nice night.

Now, I'd like to define 'nostalgia': "a yearning for the return of past circumstances; the evocation of these feelings."[via.] Nostalgia can evoke feelings of sentimentality, romance, fondness, or happiness. Nostalgia is a creeping feeling that can overwhelm a person, if properly summoned. Is there anyone out there who has yet to daydream or reminisce about ones' childhood or even just a few years back? My childhood memories might be categorized under the old 'americana' epithet; as a child, I remember running through my backyard, exploring the grass and its companions, playing with Barbies, dolls, cards, marbles, buttons, (trinkets of any kind, really), dressing up in my mom's old clothes, having tea parties and watching great cartoons every morning. One of my favorite cartoons was Rugrats on Nickelodeon. This show definitely conjures up some nostalgia for me. What do you remember?

Mark Mothersbaugh made some great music for the show.

Although I wasn't a baby when I watched the show, I identified with the characters because they had the same thirst for exploration as I did. Also, unlike real babies, they could form coherent sentences.

The patterns and color schemes of the show seem as if they, themselves were awakened from a daydream...purples skies and orange-y clouds, turquoise bushes and deep, green grass...

The archetypal characters were quirky and unique to the show, but they still somehow reminded you of someone you probably knew.

Angelica reminded me of my best friend Charlene, who was mean and would make me play the boy Barbies EVERY. TIME. She was also aloud to say stuff like 'stupid' and 'shut up.' What a villain!

And of course, I loved Didi's style. She had great, flaming hair and she knew how to color coordinate. Those glasses - work it, Deeds!

I like that the Rugrats began most of their adventures based on a tiny misunderstanding that is solved through a big adventure. They find fear in their misunderstandings, yet aim to solve it through courage and exploration. I think that the mistakes and precariousness in which the characters find themselves encompass the great experience that is childhood. Everything seems new, big, bright, and confusing, and when we think back on it now, those memories come as vivid daydreams.

That was a nice walk down memory lane, wasn't it? More to come, including small illustrations or inspirations by me.

I'd like to explore a few concepts in relation to 'nostalgia' in the future: sounds, patterns, color, the act of watching and listening (as a child in particular), past and past-times, daydreams, exploration, and archetypal characters of the 1990s and in cartoons.

Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny

I am beginning my first blog post of the new year in hopes of accomplishing one of the '23 things to do before I'm 24.' However, I do not have much to say here because I'm currently hungover and exhausted. Maybe I'll be better later on today, but I might be at the beach by then. Jeff and I are going to the beach.

In other news, I'm working on a nostalgia project. I'm not quite sure what it will turn into, but I know it will be big. I've been watching old 90s cartoons for research.

I don't know. This will need editing.

Tomorrow, I start my career in education. Well, maybe I shouldn't call it a "career," because all I'm doing is volunteering at a pre-school. It's called Mainspring, and it's a place for children ages 0 through 4 years old who are placed under free (or almost free) care, because they come from underprivileged families. I meet with a woman named Margaret Silverberg at 9 a.m. and to be honest, I'm pretty nervous. I've only worked at a place like this once in the past, and it was something of a traumatic experience (that story's for a different time though). Anyway, children now make me nervous and I'm worried that I'm going to screw it up or hate it. I'm not sure what's worse.

For the past 4 months, I've been searching for a job. I attended a liberal arts university and got my B.A. in Art History and Communications in May. I have applied for jobs at museums, retailers, grocers, law firms, hospitals, abortion clinics, and video game manufacturers. Most of the positions I applied for were "entry level," which in this economy usually requires 3-5 years of experience in a related field. So far, I haven't landed a job in any of these places because my experience is either not relevant enough or not lengthy enough. Finally, my parents made a visit to Austin to discuss my "future." Great. My mom, who has been a teacher for over 20 years, encouraged me to apply to Alternative Teaching Certification programs. So, why not? I have always wanted to teach abroad, and this should be my first step. A little experience will be good for me. I can use my creativity for good.

But lately, I've felt less and less creative. I feel discouraged because I haven't found a job and I feel as if nothing that I do is good enough, or worth any of my time or anyone else's. I used to care so much about helping those in need, but I'm continuously giving less of a fuck about anyone or anything. We'll see.

UPDATE:

I woke up at 10 a.m. this morning - about an hour before my usual greeting time as of late. For some reason, the bed felt better than it ever had this morning. I just had to keep freshly shaven legs on those covers for a little bit longer - 30 minutes, no, 45, no, an hour longer than my first alarm. It is a problem that I can reset my alarm multiple times on my iPhone each morning, as I obviously take advantage of this feature almost every morning nowadays. Like clockwork myself, I awoke and immediately went about my 'strict' morning routine: brush teeth, (maybe) wash my face, pour out some raisin bran in a hefty bowl, maybe grab a banana or some yogurt, head back upstairs to my room and begin watching Netflix. The episodes go one after the other and my ear filters out the boring stuff while I browse the web. I mindlessly click the same site over and over, accidentally forgetting that I had just clicked on it not 5 minutes ago. I laugh occasionally at Amy Poehler's ridiculous lines on Parks and Recreation, or glance up and stare intensely at my iPad to see Heisenberg rampaging across the scene of Breaking Bad. If I get uncomfortable, I sometimes stand up on my heavy legs and stretch a little bit. Wait, how did I end up back on reddit? Just then, seriously.

I did not volunteer at Mainspring because I was too lazy, but luck was in my favor on Monday because Hudson Bend Middle School called me that same day for an interview. I just went in for it at 1 p.m., and it went pretty well. I need to work on my interviewing skills though because I was nervous the whole time and now I'm hoping it wasn't too obvious. I interviewed for a receptionist position in the front office.